Remember when the Respect Doctrine of RVing was common?

Remember when the Respect Doctrine of RVing was common?

Kate Doherty

R E S P E C T . . . the basic tenet that makes a civilized society. It should be the most important word for today’s RVers. It resonated everywhere when Aretha Franklin’s song hit the Billboard Top 100 in 1967. A hallmark of the feminist movement. Do you lip sync when you hear it?

Credit Bing images The word RESPECT was on everyone’s mind as the song played.

Whether you’re a newbie or a full-timer, respect begins and ends with each of us. It should be foremost when we encounter others and our leave behind memoirs. Were we respectful to our transient home?  

The two-faced perspective

Playing the role of devil’s advocate prompted me to write this proclamation from both perspectives. First, I’m a full-time RVer, so I am beholden to abide by the rules of each park we call home. Whether it’s one-night or a month, I’m the arriving customer.  

The two faces of camping.

Turn the cheek. I’m also a work camper so I deal with a wide variety of daily encounters. Respect is not innate. It’s a learned behavior. It is fundamental as we come and go in the parking lots of life. Remember the “Random Act of Kindness” movement? And the “Pay it Forward” reverence for armed forces and first responders? Why have they waned in popularity?   

I implore those of you who are new to this lifestyle to think about the “doctrine”, so you don’t incite one of the pet peeves lodged by RVers in articles, surveys, general conversation and first-hand experience. I’ll start at the beginning to help those not acquainted with how to best query for RV site availability.

#1.  Know before you go! Convey pertinent details of your home on wheels when making reservations.  Here’s what’s needed:

  • full name and telephone (spell the name if difficult to say)
  • size and type of RV (5th wheel, travel trailer, Class A, B, or C motorhome)
  • if towing a trailer (length including tongue hitch) or passenger vehicle
  • arrival and departure dates (and if flexible) 
  • type of electric service  – 50 amp versus 30 amp
  • type of site desired (full pull-through versus back-in)
  • # of adults and children (ages) traveling with you, including pet(s)
  • communicate special needs (e.g., CPAP medical issue/physical disability)

Remember the KISS principle?

On the receiving end, it’s time consuming to determine suitability. Put yourself in their shoes. From the moment the office opens, we take care of walk-ins. Keep the KISS principle in mind. Short and sweet and to the point. You’ll appreciate reciprocal professionalism when doing so. It’s when naïve travelers show up unannounced expecting an unlimited supply of open sites engenders negative behavior.

Between interruptions, the owner and I called back all voice message queries. Just shy of 11:00 am, a woman I guessed in her mid-thirties walked in. The owner asked if she could help the individual. She spoke insipidly, “I’m so and so….I left a message. It’d be nice if you answered your phone!” The owner picked up her notes and repeated the telephone number saying, “I called you over an hour ago and no one answered.” She didn’t counter and stormed out.

#2.  Know and adhere to the rules. Informed travelers do their homework. On arrival, the park’s policies and amenities are transmitted verbally and given in writing.

On the receiving end, is withholding pertinent information. Not conveying you’re pulling a utility trailer or that your 5th wheel is 28 feet when it’s 37 feet creates a problem. It is disheartening when people act as if it’s up to the campground to figure it out.

#3.  Hook up without encroaching. Respect shared space. Position your rig so awnings or slides aren’t in your neighbor’s space. While there are no fences, there are imaginary lines that divide every site. If you arrive after hours, be respectful in your hookup and settling in.

On the receiving end, there are times when staff are asked to assist folks parking their rig. I’ve witnessed electric pedestals and septic receivers being run over. Hasty ignorance incites unpleasantries. Unless you’re rushing off to claim your lottery winnings, take a deep breath and hook up systematically for your own sanity.

Last year, an argument ensued when a newbie parked his motorhome backwards to be door to door with his friend. He plugged into the wrong pedestal. When the arriving travelers arrived at their reserved site, they realized their neighbor’s faux pas and harsh words ensued. When the arriving traveler pointed out the mistake, the offender brushed it off saying, “Just plug into that one,” pointing to the pedestal one site over. The arriving traveler responded, “You parked backwards. This is our pedestal.” The brazen body language displayed lack of respect. Only then did one of the work campers drive up to quell the situation, requiring the offender to move his motorhome and orient it correctly or leave.

#4.  Don’t cut through your neighbor’s site. Your pet too! Like tenant’s rights, your site has an imaginary boundary. Respect your neighbor’s site for the same.

On the receiving end of complaints regarding cutting through sites by noisy kids and pets lacks respect. Put yourself in the shoes of the RVer who watched noisy kids running with a dog cutting through their site as the extending leash caught the edge of their side table spilling beverages. That doesn’t go unnoticed.

#5.  Leash your pet and clean up their poo! Many parks/campgrounds install a dog park to play with and exercise their four-legged friends. Since dog’s can’t flush, pick up their poop! And what’s worse? Allowing the dog to poo in someone else’s site and you ignore it! You as a responsible pet owner should be prepared.   

Credit Bing images. Typical pet rules found in many parks.

On the receiving end of several complaints over owners not picking up their dog’s poop, I find it mind boggling how owners feel it is not their responsibility to clean up after their pooch. Dog parks are an amenity. It is not the campground’s responsibility to clean up after your dog.  Don’t expect that everyone is a dog lover or that your pooch interacts well with other dogs. One comment from a bystander I met told me he first offers the owner a bag as he carries extras. If they refuse the bag, he picks up their dog’s poop and takes it back to their site telling them “I think you forgot this.” He stated, “It often incites name calling among other things.”  

A couple I met from Topeka, Kansas visiting the Badlands this past July shared their encounter with an unruly pet. The husband was sitting on the steps of his fifth wheel enjoying a late afternoon beverage with his wife. Without warning, a dog darted underneath this traveler’s fifth wheel via an extended leash and bit his leg, tearing his jeans. Thankfully, the individual was wearing a high, rigid foot brace so no flesh, just torn jeans. The dog owner apologetically spoke, “He’s never done that before,” while pulling back on the leash offering to pay for the ripped jeans. Hint: the dog owner could have prevented the incident completely if he had kept the dog on a short leash as the park’s policy stipulated a six-foot leash, always maintaining control over your pet.

#6.  Respect quiet time. Quiet time is common at most campgrounds. Not adhering to this policy can easily get you evicted with prejudice. With prejudice means you would not be invited back! Quiet time means no loud music, television or radios or cacophonous chatter after the witching hour. Imbibing alcohol can be part of celebratory events. It can also be the instigator for raising the decibel level beyond normal conversation. If you’re sitting around a fire pit, please be sure the smoke doesn’t infiltrate your neighbor’s windows.  

One last “quiet issue” to recount is incessantly barking dogs and screaming children. Dogs bark, but they don’t need to bark incessantly, especially when tethered to or left inside one’s RV or portable pen. Your neighbors may not enjoy their annoying woofs.  

#7.  Respect the lavatory and laundry facilities. Would you treat your own bathroom and laundry as some treat campground’s facilities? Accidental leaving of sundry items happens from time to time. But wet undergarments and dirty diapers on the floor reflects serious lack of respect and social graces. I witnessed the result of mischievous children who threw gobs of wet toilet paper and soap on the walls, mirrors and floors. This shameful behavior indicates complete lack of respect. Young children should not be allowed in without supervision.


One avoidable confrontation occurred recently when a male staffer was half-way through regular cleaning of the ladies’ shower stalls when a middle-aged woman walked in bypassing the roped off door, mop bucket and cleaning container. When the male staffer stepped out of the shower with cleaning supplies in hand, the woman barked, “What are you doing in here? This is the ladies room!” The staffer responded, “Well if you had read the park’s rules, you would know that the bathrooms are closed between eleven and twelve daily for cleaning.” The woman snapped back, “Just wanted to make sure you didn’t have dementia.” The staffer responded, “The bathroom is closed,” and she stormed out. The staffer reported the incident to the owners.

#8 Keep track of your kids and monitor their behavior.

Kids need to play and have fun, but vandalism and mischievous behavior just ruins it for everyone. I grew up with the adages – children should be seen and not heard… and one bad apple spoils the whole bushel. That didn’t mean complete silence. It meant managed noise with happy endings. For instance, swimming pools typically have rules – no running, diving and being underage without supervision. No one wants kids cannonballing those quietly reading poolside.

On the receiving side, I watched the owner twice warn two young boys to stop climbing the trees in the flower bed. The third indiscretion occurred when the owner had to usher the same two boys out of the pool area as it was being cleaned, ninety minutes prior to its opening. The owner visited the parents reminding them that park’s policies had to be adhered to for everyone’s sake.

#9.  If you bring it in, please take it with you. For those travelers who order supplies online, campgrounds are not a dumping ground for your discarded boxes. Tie your garbage bags so when the refuse company arrives, your leftovers and toiletries aren’t strewn on the ground. Last summer at a campground my spouse and I worked, if you didn’t appropriately lock the dumpsters, bears would rifle through the garbage, some of it ending up in the trees. So, the next time you throw that box in the dumpster, break it down.   

Is it laziness or just plain ol’ don’t care. I watched these newbies leave the garbage by the tree when the receptacle was across the street right behind the back of the parked trailer. Shameful!

Being on the receiving end, why do people think they can leave food on picnic tables or lazily throw restaurant leftovers or half-full soft drink containers willy nilly in garbage cans in the bathroom? Ew! Garbage receptacles need no help in creating a wet ecosystem. Just recently, I witnessed a young lady leave their garbage by a tree in their site right before departing. The trash receptacle was 75 feet across the parking lot and dumpsters are positioned at the end of every street. It is not the responsibility of staff to pick up RVer’s garbage.

#10.  Campground hosts and office staff deserve respect. A big mistake is stereotyping work campers as if they need to work and treat them disparagingly. Work campers volunteer. You’ll find folks with doctorate, medical and law degrees, so don’t stereotype them. What newbies should realize is there’s usually a wealth of knowledge and experience they could glean if they simply asked nicely.

On the receiving end of attitudinal disrespect, why do those who are new to camping believe that it is the campground’s responsibility when they failed to make a reservation in a timely manner? Hearing comments like, “What are we supposed to do?” have been uttered to the office personnel when there are no sites available for the date(s) they are requesting.

I’ll end this by stating “put yourself in their shoes” the next time you interact with a work camper. Perhaps you’ll gain some perspective on why you’re RVing in the first place.

You may read this published article in FMCA FamilyRVing magazine: Family RVing Magazine – May 2022 (advanced-pub.com) and in this FMCAdventure BLOG: Campground Etiquette • FMCAdventure

Kate Doherty has been writing for more than 30 years in technical and general media. In her previous business, she and her spouse dealt with special projects within the military/government sector. Recently she published Masquerade: A Logan Scott Novel under the pen name Bryan Alexander, a thriller now available in eBook and paperback on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Apple iBooks. It’s a page-turner!